Thursday, October 25, 2007

Revenge!

Not all my knitting is for me - most is (I'm greedy like that) but some is for mum, some for dad, some for the children, some for complete strangers and even on two occasions for my husband.

The first thing I ever made him was a lovely dark turquoise jumper, complete with collar, pocket and contrasting trim at the cast on edge. Very lovely - warm (it was an alpaca blend), cosy and a lovely fit. He didn't like it, so I undid the collar, re-worked it and made it so he did like it. He actually wore it. Miracle! Yes, but he wore it when creosoting the fence. It stank. So I hand-washed it and it still stank.

Husband - 'Put it in the washer'
Me - 'No way, it will shrink'
Husband - 'No it won't if you do it on a cool wash'
Me - 'Yes it will'
Husband - 'You never listen to me, I'm going to do it'

Readers, do not put your hand-knit alpaca jumpers in the wash. Not only do they shrink, but they go very fluffy and fill the washer with fluff for weeks to come.

The second jumper was made in secret for a Christmas present, using a dark blue Rowan chunky tweedy wool. Again lovely. He never liked this one, but wore it to please me. Then guess what? He creosoted the fence again, put it in the washer, and lo and behold it shrank.

So one year I decided that enough was enough and I bought him a jumper from a very nice gentleman's outfitters in Ely. He loved it. Hurrah! Wore it lots, got it dirty and then let me wash it. Tee hee!

Whoopsy daisy darling, your favourite jumper seems to have shrunk in the washer!

So I cut it up, knitted a flower, assembled the lot on one of those Sainsbury's jute bags and hey-presto, a Christmas present from the children to my mother-in-law.

Any suggestions as to what husband can have for Christmas this year?

8 comments:

Locket Pocket said...

Revenge is so sweet! I only knitted my husband one jumper (oh, and two socks) and he wore the jumper all the time but it just kept growing, not shrinking! The arms are about a foot too long! He used to wear it for work (as an archaeologist) and one American volunteer wondered if all archaeologists wore outsized handknitted jumpers - like Mick Aston on Time Team! I replied that it was just a reflection of my knitting skills! Lucy x

Pink Sky said...

I am still laughing at this post. Your husband is lucky to be alive!

What a lovely bag! Revenge is not only sweet, but pretty. :D

Mama said...

That is BRILLIANT! (hmmm...do we have any sweaters that could use an accidental washing?)

ps: Sean keeps asking me to knit an Irish Fisherman's Sweater for him - this from a man who doesn't even wear a coat in winter! Don't think that he'll be getting it anytime soon : )

Rosie said...

I vote that you make him a man bag out of the jumper! But, oh, what is it about husbands and the things we knit for them? Mine lost a carefully-crafted Kureyon scarf, then wore the Silk Garden replacement whilst sawing logs (at least I could darn that one better).

picperfic said...

I think you should get him a totally acrylic, machine washable and tumble dry, full of static electricity jumper! Painting the fences in his best jumpers and then washing them himself, in the machine??!!!??? whatever was he thinking of? Naughty husband!

Denise said...

What about the lovely 'Dashing' fingerless gloves from Knitty.com? But don't let him creosote the fence in them!!!

Monkee Maker said...

I think you should have learnt after the first one not to knit him another! He obviously doesn't deserve your skills of knit!

Anonymous said...

I haven't knitted a jumper for Warren as I figure he can now knit his own, but I did make him an ice-cream cosy for Christmas one year. No more cold fingers when demolishing a tub of Green & Black's chocolate ice-cream!